Our family

Our family

Friday, September 30, 2011

Married, 3 Kids, and Wow!





So...it's been WAY too long since I updated this blog, but I thought since I had a little time tonight I'd update on what's been going on. When I last posted, John and I had only known each other for just over a month and were emailing back and forth. So much has happened since then!! Here is the skinny (my journal entry which is also on our wedding website) on how we met, fell in love, and are making our happily ever after!

John and I met on EHarmony. I had told myself I wouldn't do the online dating thing again as I had already tried one dating site and had a bad experience, but a co-worker suggested I try it out just to at least have some options. I decided to do it, thinking "Well, why not? What do I have to lose?" Ha ha. Little did I know what was in store :) :) Just a couple of days after I joined, EHarmony matched John and me together. The first time I saw his profile, I thought "Wow, his countenance really glows and if he is for real, I would really like to get to know him better." I sent him a little "flirt" (so cheesy, I know ;) ), saying how I liked his smile, and he responded by starting the getting to know you process with questions and all. We emailed back and forth for about a month or so, then decided to skype and start talking on the phone. I was a little overwhelmed at first with the thought of John being a widower and having 3 kids already (John's wife had passed away over a year ago) but couldn't get over how perfect he seemed for me. I honestly felt like I had found my best friend. We talked about how it felt we had known each other for longer than we had and it really surprised both of us. John had a medical conference in Boston the first part of May and so called me every day/night when he was free and we ended up talking for hours. As we continued to get to know each other, I thought "Wow, how does he seem to know me and fit me so well?" He sent me a card for my birthday that was so thoughtful and would do little things that meant so much, like sending me an email just before starting work just to say hi. He would write me novel emails that took hours when he didn't have that much time being in residency and raising three kids. I was so impressed with his dedication to the Gospel and to his family. I was also amazed at how intelligent and ambitious he is. He completely won me over with how well he treated me and how much he cared about me and all I was doing. He treated me so much better than anyone I had ever dated and it seemed so easy, not forced at all. I felt like I was at home with him. He is so committed to all he does, especially relationships, and that impressed me most of all. After his medical conference in Boston, we talked about meeting in person. We had both thought about it before, but had been scared to bring it up. We talked about John coming out to DC to visit, but since it would be difficult with the kids, I suggested going out to Tucson and visiting them. I looked up flights and it just so happened that flights to Tucson from DC were really cheap (go figure ;) ). I bought a ticket and planned to fly out after my trip to Israel and Egypt. I would be gone for three weeks and we thought we wouldn't be able to talk because of international rates, but John found a cheap way to call me on Skype. We just continued to fall for each other even more. I flew out to Tucson a few days after my big trip and John's mom and the kids met me at the airport. I was SO nervous, but the kids ran up to me and gave me huge hugs, instantly easing any nervousness. We went to lunch and read stories, and I could hardly wait until John got home from work. He called me when he was almost home and I got butterflies. I was SO excited! He walked in to the apartment and I instantly knew. I thought "Ok, I'm sold." Ha ha. I never believed in love at first sight, but I certainly do now. :) We had developed such a great friendship and relationship over the past few months that it was even that much better in person. We went out on our "first date" that night and just had such an amazing time. I felt so at home with John and the kids and couldn't believe it. I thought I was crazy for knowing instantly that he was who I wanted to marry, but also couldn't deny how right it felt. We talked about everything and anything the whole weekend and I just felt I had come home. We talked about marriage that weekend and both just felt it was right and that we should and wanted to go forward. I felt I had found the man I had been looking for my whole life.

I can't believe I am so lucky to have found John and the kids. When John and I first talked about marriage, we thought we'd get married sometime next Spring or even after he got done with his residency, but that seemed way too long to wait, so we talked about November. We discussed Thanksgiving and semi-decided on that. I was talking to my friend Teresa one day and she said "So when are you moving to Tucson?" and, I know, kind of crazy, but that was completely a new idea to me. I had thought we would just do the long distance thing while we were engaged, then get married in November. The thought of moving to Tucson scared me a little bit (I had my dream job and was really happy in DC---big change), but I considered it and prayed about it. I suggested it to John the next day and he was so surprised that I would do that for him. I just felt it was really important to date each other in the same state and get to know each other even better. I started looking into dates when I could move. I figured I would give Nysmith the option to have me work into the school year if they couldn't find anyone, then move out as soon as they found someone. I emailed Linda, our HR person, and told her I was engaged and looking to move to Tucson and that I would be willing to work until they found someone, asking what they would like me to do. She emailed back telling me congratulations and that they would just find someone for the whole year, so I went in the next day for my exit interview and that was that! It was crazy to leave that job---very bittersweet. I know I was led to that job in so many ways---for the experiences I had, the people I met and befriended---I will never forget that wonderful chapter in my life. There were so many people at Nysmith, and in DC, who left footprints on my heart and who I will always remember so dearly. After the exit interview, things just fell into place. John and I talked about my going out to Tucson after Labor Day, when he would fly to DC to meet all of my friends. I was planning on going to Denver in August to meet his family, drive down with him and the kids to UT to meet my family, do some wedding planning, then fly back to DC. As we thought about it more, we felt that it would make more sense to just be moved out when I flew to Denver---so, that meant me moving and selling and complete craziness for about two weeks!!! The day after we made the decision for me to move out on August 4th, I sold my housing contract, sold the rest of my things by the time I left, and had all ready to go, two suitcases in hand, by the time August 4th came and I was on my way to Denver. Phew!!! I still can't believe it all happened!! I had a lot of stuff that I wanted to send to Tucson, and just figured I would ship it. A good friend of mine told me a couple of nights before I left for Denver that she was driving out to UT and would let me put some things of mine on the UHaul truck she was renting. Talk about a blessing and completely meant to be. I felt like that was every minute of this whole adventure. Things just kept falling into place---I truly believe they do when things are right and when Heavenly Father is guiding the situation. It's not often easy, but it always works out in the way and at the time that it should. I flew out to Denver and met John's family. I had already met his mom, so it was great seeing her again. I felt so at ease with John's family and immediately accepted into his family. I was pretty nervous about meeting ALL of the family (including John's in-laws), but prayed constantly that hearts would be softened and that it would go well. John and I went over to his late wife Britney's parents house and I was SOOO nervous. Immediately, though, Jana, Britney's mom, gave me a hug and we started talking. She just got tears in her eyes and told me she knew John was so in love by how happy he looked and that she had prayed for someone to come along with whom it was right and here I was. We both shared some tears and some very precious experiences and I knew, again, Heavenly Father had guided this situation in all aspects. It was so incredible!! After a couple of days in Denver, John and I drove down to UT to meet my family. We stayed at my parents house and John was nervous, I think, but my family instantly loved him (how could they not??!!!!). I was so relieved and felt so blessed. My dad had been pretty sick prior to us getting there, and John wanted to ask my dad if he could marry me, but wasn't sure when would be a good time. I guess the moment didn't need to be planned, though, because John was asking my mom when she thought it would be good to ask my dad, and my dad walked in and said "Yes, of course. Just take good care of her. She is a precious daughter." Ha. My dad was instantly sold just like me :) :) The next day, August 8, 2011, we went to my brother Judson's house for Family Home Evening, then Jud and Marisa let us get away from the kids for some "alone time". I knew the proposal was coming, I just didn't know how he was going to do it :) John took me up the canyon by my parents' house and showed me the song he had written me. He said he had written it one night after we talked on the phone and had felt such love for me that he wrote all of his feelings down in a song. It was so tender and heartfelt that I began to cry. He knelt down on one knee and asked me if I would marry him. I said yes!!!! It was honestly one of the most joyous and beautiful nights of my life. My heart almost leaped out of my chest because I was so happy! I felt so lucky to be engaged to marry the most wonderful man for eternity. Heavenly Father had answered my prayers in every way. I had prayed for a man to come along who recognized me and who I recognized, who was my best friend, and who loved me for all of me, for who I am. It is absolutely incredible to me how all of those prayers offered over 31 years were answered in the Lord's time and in His way. I just had to submit my will to His, continue living righteously, doing all I could, and He would do the rest. John and I were so prepared for each other, and I was prepared in all the experiences I had had to that point to be an instant mom of three kids.

We were married on September 17th, in the Bountiful LDS Temple, and it was such a joyous day! It was more beautiful than anything I could have imagined and I'm so grateful to all the friends and family who were there and who helped out with everything. John and I spent our honeymoon in a beautiful cabin in Heber and just enjoyed our time together! We got back to Tucson last Wednesday night and are exhausted, but so happy. It's been quite the adjustment being an instant mother of 3 and wife and living in a new state. There have been some rough days and I'm sure still will be, but I do love our little family and am so excited to continue this adventure with my best friend!


13 comments:

  1. My darling wonderful friend, I am so happy for you. You are joy personified. Call me when things get rough. I am a mother of three, too and can't imagine suddenly having all three at once. You are amazing. I love you to pieces.

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  2. Thank you for sharing that wonderful story with us. Almost seemed like a fairytale! Crazy how when things are right, they just work. It's all about being patient and trusting in the Lord's time. Love you girl!

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  3. Congrats! So happy for you!!

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  4. I'm so happy for you! Congratulations - you deserve every happiness :)

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  5. I didn't know you had a blog! What a great post. And what a great story. So sweet. So perfect. If you need to vent call me! I can't imagine being a wife an instant mom of 3 all at the same time! So many trials and joy all at the same time. You are wonder woman! Love you!

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  6. What a fabulous story. If there is anyone who deserves ultimate happiness it is you Rachel! You are incredible. So excited for your cute little family. What a blessing you are to each other.

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  7. Oh Rachel! This is such a beautiful story! I was hoping to hear the full story and it makes me so happy for you and John and the kids! It made me cry! I wish I had been able to go to the reception and see your beautiful smile, meet John and the children, and share in the happy day. I love you beautiful Rachel Winkler!

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  8. Love this! Your fairy tale is beautiful, thank you for sharing! I wish I could have been there on your special day--the photos show the HAPPINESS and love that you two share! I look forward to more blogging & updates from you :) Mrs. Winkler :)

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  9. LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE. LOOOOOVVVEEEEE!!!!! It was so fun to read through what I would hear and feel over the phone. What a romantic and real story! I am so happy and grateful everything - even the minute details all worked out. You are an angel and blessed woman! I have checked your blog a few times since we chatted, and was SOOOO happy to see you posted. I sure miss you!!!! Thank you for writing your story down. SO worth the time. What a blessing to have and remember. Love you!!!!

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  10. You are a precious gift to John, the children and to all of us. I love your story. John has meant so much to us all of his life. He is blessed by your love.

    Diane Kartchner

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  11. Rachel, thanks for your story. You know we wouldn't get the good details from John. You are an answer to many prayers. I am so happy for both of you. I know with God's help that your new family will thrive.

    Bonnie House

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  12. Wall!!! Oops, I meant...Winkler!!!

    I came across the email that you sent back in October with the link to this blog and video. All I can say is WOW!!

    Such a beautiful story. It couldn't have happened to a more wonderful person. Congratulations!!

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