The past couple of days have been more
exhausting than anything else. I guess, however, as I am discovering, that is just
a part of mommyhood :)
Anna has been a challenge lately. From tantrums, hitting, pinching, wiping her nose on anything BUT a tissue, singing in a loud voice for even our neighbors to hear that keeps her sister up at night, drawing with chalk and pen on anything and everything, to many, many more things I never knew would occur to someone to do. I've had many days where I wonder who took away the sweet little girl I once knew. Ha ha. I go to bed at night praying that somehow, despite all of my weaknesses and inadequacies, the kids will be physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually healthy and stable, able to have happy lives, and that I will be able to continue to love them and grow to love them even more. Well, and that I will survive through some of those "days" still functioning as a sane individual ;). Some days are fairly conflict-free and others I am just grateful when we get to bedtime (and it happens to be early ;) ), but I have realized that those "days" do pass and that there is a tomorrow that begins "fresh, with no mistakes in it", a quote from one of my favorite movies, Anne of Green Gables. Through the challenges since taking on instant mommyhood, and especially the past few weeks, I have realized many things, among them first, how wonderful it is to have a husband who stands by me no matter how grumpy or burned out I am, who always does whatever he can to help me, and who is very sensitive and understanding to all that I'm going through; Second, how important it is to savor the good moments and remember them when there's a 2 yr old drawing on the pillows; Third, how amazing and yet humbling it is to have a Heavenly Father who trusts me enough to let me raise three of His children.
So, though the tantrums are trying as is the two-yr old who throws them, I know this is where I am supposed to be and that somehow, as long as I'm doing my best, it will all work out for the best!
So, though the tantrums are trying as is the two-yr old who throws them, I know this is where I am supposed to be and that somehow, as long as I'm doing my best, it will all work out for the best!
It sounds like you are a great mom, Rachel. I wondered for a while if it was normal to heave a big sigh when the kids were finally in bed for the night. But I've come to figure out that mommyhood is exhausting when you're doing it right.
ReplyDeleteThanks Neoma. I really appreciate that. I have wondered the same thing myself and if I'm normal when I look forward to bedtime :)
DeleteHear, hear sister friend. I had one of those days yesterday where I cried 3 times in front of the kids and once more as I was saying my prayers that night. Sometimes, I can't do anything right but survive and I hate that. Some day, I'd love to feel on top of things. Alas, the best part is going to bed with the hope that the next day is better. Today has been, so I guess I'll keep being a mom, eh? Ha ha. Keep up the good work. You're doing great!
ReplyDeleteThanks girl. I just read this and it helped my burned out self today :) :)
DeleteYOu are doing GREAT!!! We've had several crazy days lately too--I think for parenthood, "crazy" is the new "normal" ;) Love you!!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much. The encouragement is what I definitely need today :)
DeleteI SO remember when my daughter, Hannah was going through this stage, and it IS a stage... Anna will grow out of it :)! I recently found some pictures I took of Hannah standing next to all of her "artwork"... on the couch, desk, walls, and cupboards... most of which was created with permanent marker. I can laugh about it now... it wasn't so much fun back then ~ thank goodness for the Magic Eraser! Parenthood is a roller coaster ride for sure, and I appreciate your example of praying for your sweet family! You're doing an amazing job, Rachel! You are a blessing & have the best attitude of looking to your blessings, especially during your challenges. The love you have for your new family warms my heart. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much Julianne. I am trying and my effort seems a little better than others some days :), but your comment made me smile and helped me, especially today. You are wonderful! Thank you!
Delete