9, 6, and 3!!

Here are the photos we got taken of each of the kids for their birthdays (a little late for Jonas and Anna, but at least they got done right???) Ha. Enjoy!

Love this pic of him.

Soo cute!

Our photographer said she's 6 going on 16...not sure how I feel about that!!!

 We had a great photographer and I'm so happy with how they turned out. Now on to make our family photo book for the year...

Gratitude

I just have to say that today I am grateful. Grateful for a husband who loves and cherishes me, who is a man of incredible character and faith, and who puts God and His will above his own. I am grateful for 3 children who told me tonight "Mommy, we love it when you do rockabyes" and "Mommy, we missed you and we love you" and who write notes saying "I hope we can spend some time together for special time soon". Grateful for beach sunsets in Cancun, long walks on the beach (yes!!!), Eharmony, long talks with old friends that make it seem like you talked to them yesterday, best friends who know you so well, grand pianos, the sound of Rachmaninoff's music, cool fall breeze in the early morning, non-alcoholic strawberry daiquiris, homemade Zuppa Toscana, Zumba, a long, refreshing shower after working out super hard and feeling clean, and...well, I could go on all night.

It's amazing how beginning to list a few things leads to more and more as you realize how many blessings are truly in your life. I've found myself getting caught in the downward spiral of not recognizing as often as I should how many blessings I have---and the importance of holding on to those, and the moments that come along with them. They are a gift, and I find myself just going through the daily grind, forgetting often those little moments and how they are the Lord's tender mercies---one of His ways of showing me how much He loves me. I think of the many scriptures in the Book of Mormon that encourage us to "remember" and I am gently prompted by the Spirit to remember how the Lord has blessed me. I am grateful for those gentle promptings, helping me become better and prompting me to change course if needed. I feel so much gratitude to my Heavenly Father who gave His Only Begotten Son so that I could repent and be forgiven and return to Him one day. I feel so blessed to be able to be with my family for eternity because of the Savior Jesus Christ and His love for each one of us. I am also incredibly grateful for the Atonement of Jesus Christ, through which my burdens and trials have often been lifted so that I can take that extra step or steps; I honestly don't know where I would be without the power of the Atonement. I have come to know my Savior better through those experiences in life and, though I can't say I would want to go through them again, I am grateful for a loving Father in Heaven who knew I needed those things to continue to become who He wants me to become.

I am grateful to all of you, my family and friends, who give so much support and love to my family and me. Maybe this is cheesy, but I like cheese, and I am grateful for YOU. Yep, it's true. Until next time.

Cancun!

I'm so looking forward to going to Cancun with John! We are going for our anniversary trip and are pretty excited. It's our real honeymoon as we only got about 3 days when we were first married...yahoo!!! A friend told me to come back tan...ner. Ha. I may not get to that point with my fair skin, but at least will be out on the beach in the sun relaxing and enjoying time with John. Thanks for all your support guys! See you in a week!

Motherhood...

So this post is straight from the heart today. I've been thinking a lot about motherhood lately, especially since it's been a year ago last week that I became an instant mom and started in on this adventure. There are so many moments where I think "This is why I love being a mom" and then there are other moments where I think "Did I really sign up for this?" I hear and see so many things from other moms about how they love being a mom and how it's the best job in the world and...I'm sorry to admit, but I don't feel that way all of the time. I have wondered so many times if I really am cut out for being a mom and really have it in me to continue to love and be patient through the "Mommy is stupid", the "I like Daddy betters", the "You're not my mom, she is, and I wish I were with her instead", the "This is why I don't like you..." and the day in and day out rigors of it all---emotionally, physically, mentally, etc. Perhaps I need to grow a thicker skin, but how do you find the joy in motherhood? I know it can be found and I know it is possible because I have seen it. Perhaps my expectations need to be changed or my perspective needs to be different? I'm not sure. I worry about when the kids become teenagers and the dreaded words are spoken "You're not my mom!!!" I worry about helping them grow emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually. I worry about making sure I am raising these kids with the help of their mother Britney, and striving to do my best in her place. Will they be healthy and happy and am I messing them up for life??? How do I give them all that they need? I do my best to follow inspiration as I know Heavenly Father knows them best and that as I strive to follow the Spirit, He will guide me, but I often feel so inadequate!

I trust that this is where I am supposed to be and that Heavenly Father wants me to be part of this family. I know He will provide and that He wants me to be happy. He has given me strength to get through so many trials so far and I know if I rely on the Savior, things always seem better. I just keep pressing forward---and I hope that somehow, I will be able to change whatever I need to in order to see things differently if that's what needs to happen.

Some thoughts as I go through this crazy life I have, with it's ups and downs, trying to remember those joyful moments to get me through the not so joyful ones...

Fun adventures the past couple of months...

So I'm WAY behind on posting photos, but here are some from the past couple of months. I will post some of the house soon...

Anna at Cougar Run Park

Anna having fun at a horse ride at the Highlands Ranch Rodeo!

We had our family pictures taken by Carrie Elton, a most fabulous photographer. We LOVE how they turned out!

My new Estonia baby grand piano. I. LOVE. IT. It is wonderful having a piano again!

Jonas at the Rodeo!!

John and Me. I sure love that man!

Jonas at Cougar Run Park, his favorite. It has a pirate ship :) There's all sorts of pretending that can be done...and they did.

I just picture Jonas like this when they get older. The protective and caring older brother :)

We went to the Renaissance Festival in Highlands Ranch. They had so much fun! Anna and Vera loved the Fairy who was there. She gave them special jewel rocks :)

Kids at the Rodeo!

Now this one is from Tucson, before we moved. We went to the Children's Museum and they had a blast!!

Sisters. Sisters. There were never such devoted sisters...

I made these cupcakes for Vera's Birthday. Can't believe she is 6 years old!!

Vera at Cougar Run Park!

Vera riding the horse at the Rodeo!

Now this was classic. Vera writes me notes everyday and this is one she did a couple of days ago. She and Anna are there with a little baby named Lera. That seems to be the name of choice for the "extra" member of our family. Oh, and she also drew a fridge to the right if you couldn't tell what it was. So cute.

It's been a long time...

In the midst of the craziness that has been our life the past year, I've had the impression that I need to write down little things about Jonas, Vera, and Anna (personality, things they say/have said, etc) as well as making a photo book of each year so that they will have them for later on in life. Here is the beginning of me finally getting around to it now that the house is unpacked and clean (though who knows for how long :) ), pictures are on some of the walls :), and kids are at the park with Gma and Aunts and Anna is sleeping. We'll see how much time I have... ;)

I'll start with Jonas...

Jonas, now 9 years old and starting 4th grade in two days, is affectionate and always saying "I love you." He has grown tall and gotten skinnier and is 54" tall and weighs 56 pounds. We're trying to put some meat on those bones :) He has such a good heart and always strives to do his best. He loves to read, ride his bike with Dad, and ask tons of questions. He learns quickly and soaks in new knowledge like a sponge. His strongest subjects are math and reading and he is increasing his vocabulary daily. Jonas tells me that he is deciding whether to be an engineer, a pharmacist, or a teacher when he grows up. His favorite color is green and his favorite food is Italian chicken in the crockpot. He wants to learn how to play baseball and the piano and I will start teaching him piano lessons in about two weeks. He is such a good helper around the house and is very good at remembering to do his chores. He loves to swim and play outside and just made a friend in our ward---they get along great! He loves his friends and family, plays so well with his sisters, and is a great big brother. Jonas loves to read his scriptures at night before he goes to bed and told me today "I like to take my mini Book of Mormon wherever I go. It helps me and I really like reading it whenever I have a spare minute." Wow. He is such a strong spirit. We love him.

Vera, now 6 years old and starting 1st grade in two days, is also very affectionate and loves giving hugs. She is growing tall, is 44" tall and weighs 39 lbs. She loves to read Pinkalicious books and write notes to Mommy and Daddy. Vera is just learning to ride a bike without training wheels and loves going out with Daddy. She loves to dance and sing and wants to be a professional singer when she grows up. Vera loves to be silly, play with dolls and jewelry, and with her little sister Anna. She is learning how to swim and is much more comfortable in the water than she was a few months ago. She and Anna love to play "Mom and Daughter" where they tell each other "Ok, honey, I'm heading to the store to get some fruits and vegetables. I'll be back soon. Love you!" and walk off to another part of the house with purse over arm and their fake coins in hand. Pretty adorable. Vera loves to eat homemade tacos and chicken noodle soup. She is very friendly (sometimes a little too friendly---we have to remind her of stranger rules) and makes friends so easily. Vera writes notes daily to each member of our family, reminding us how much she loves us (and likes us :) ) and is glad we are her family. She asks me daily when there will be a baby in my tummy. Vera told a friend who came over the other day that the extra cubby for shoes in the mudroom was for the baby. Ha. I think she's hinting... ;) Vera loves singing songs and she told us yesterday that when she had a nightmare, she sang "Love One Another" to help her feel better. I sure love that little girl.

Anna, now 3 years old and loving being "Free" (with her fingers held up), loves being cuddled and hugged and I often hear "Mommy, will you hold me?" She is tall and just keeps growing. A dress that fit her two months ago is now too short for her! I can't believe it. At her last appointment, she measured 38" tall and weighed 29 lbs. Anna loves playing with Vera and doing "letters" on the computer. She can count to 15 and loves seeing how fast she can get dressed. She can dress herself (and is very proud of it---"Mommy! Look! I did it all by myself!") and loves playing with dress-ups. She loves to jump, run, and go hiking. She wants to do homework with "The kids" as she calls them and can't wait to start school. She remembers things really well, especially names. One day back in Tucson, we were driving down the street where the missionaries lived and she said "That's where the missionaries live, huh Mommy?" We had been there once and it had been several months. Anna loves to be tickled and wants to be "Mommy doctor" when she grows up. Her favorite food is hot dogs and tomatoes and she loves the color pink. She says the most random things that make us laugh...on the way to Gma Rowley's house yesterday, she said, "I wonder what would happen if we drove in the trees." Then, a minute later, said, "We shouldn't drive through the trees because of the monkeys." Ha ha. Anna loves the song "Lullaby" by Brahms and each night when we do our bedtime ritual, she asks me to sing it to her and closes her eyes and lays down in my lap.  We love Anna!

These little kids are such strong spirits and I often can't believe I get to be their stepmom.

I'll post some pics of our latest adventures soon!

The big MOVE!!!

This blog post comes from our new house in Denver! I can hardly believe it. After 3 months of ups and downs in buying a house, we were FINALLY approved on a home loan and now are in a beautiful house with a basement and a yard! Having both of those things is a luxury to me and I'm pretty grateful for them! The move was pretty crazy as we went to UT first for a family reunion and my parents 50th wedding anniversary, then continued on to Denver from there. We spent the reunion at a cabin in Fairview and the kids loved getting to know their new cousins. After that was the anniversary celebration and we all had a great time! I had written a song for my parents as a tribute to all they have been and done for me---I just prayed that I would be able to get through it without crying :) I saw lots of old friends and was able to introduce them to John and the kids. I'll post pictures soon!

It was fabulous to be able to relax a little bit while at home. I just love being there and it was rejuvenating! We left this past Tuesday to come to Denver and it was quite the adventure...I forgot my purse (I tell myself it was because I had a lot on my mind :) ) so my parents had to bring it to me. Luckily we were only about 20 min away; otherwise we would have had some problems! :) Vera told me about 2 hours into the trip that her tummy hurt and she felt like she was going to throw up. She often says this, so I just told her to look forward and at the road and before I could even finish, I heard that horrible noise of...THROWING UP. We were in the middle of nowhere and got off the next exit where there was nothing but a 50 mph wind, a horse and cart, and a man who looked at me like I was crazy. I got Vera and her clothes, booster seat, and self cleaned up, had her change clothes, then proceeded on our way. Not really the most fun way to start out a trip. I became a little more at ease when both Anna and Vera fell asleep and thought "Ok, bad start, but this will probably be all right." Ha. We all know it's no fun being stuck in a car for hours, especially for kids. I was a little too hasty, I'm afraid. It's like driving in the car turned on some sort of switch to annoy Mommy with endless questions that I had answered about 2 minutes earlier and whine about anything and everything, among other things. However, we made it through the whinings, the "I'm hungries", the "when will we be there"s, and the just plain grumpies, and finally made it to Denver! Huge sigh of relief.

So...after this crazy move time, I have learned, decided, and been reminded of a few things:
1. Throw up is gross whether or not it's the throw up of someone you love.
2. Driving in the car will be restricted to 5 min for the next 6 months to 1 year.
3. Being around family is absolutely rejuvenating.
4. Dollar toys at Target are a beautiful thing.
5. The Arbys in Laramie is lying to you when they say it's fast food.
6. Having my husband with me on the drive is much less stressful.
7. Staying in a cabin with 40 people is a blast, despite all the chaos.
8. Heavenly Father really does watch over us always and knows exactly how we feel and because of this, He knows how to help us if we will come to Him.
9. My parents are very, very patient, loving, and diligent.
10. I am incredibly blessed.

Until next time...I will be posting dinner menus as soon as we get a little more settled. Life Cereal has been our friend lately :) :)